Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Like A Ghost/Poltergeist, It Haunts Me

Those words. Uttered by a bastard!

"Apa faedah kitak berkawan ngan geng dak Bob ngan Boy Sibu ya? Dah lah maen dadah." (What is the point of you being friends with Bob and Boy Sibu? They are drug addicts!)

AND

"Apa bagus glak si Aone maen dadah ya? Bukan ada hasel pun..." (Why does Aone do drugs? There isn't any benefits out of it...)

Yeah, right, Asshole... You are such a lying hypocrite. It is okay to handle a hypocrite but a LYING HYPOCRITE? That is NOT okay. Why does he make himself look superior and perfect when he, too, does drugs. Wait. ADDICT TO THOSE CRYSTAL METHS, too.

No wonder his eyes are always so yellow and lips are always so dry. He is an addict. He is a user. So, no wonder he needs money...

The other thing that makes me wonder is, why is he such a backstabber? He talks bad about his own friends behind their backs and yet he does the same thing he criticize them for doing!

And these are the friends who've covered for him! Mother fucker! I wish I could tell his family, who are blindly supporting him... HAHA! How I wish I could tell them their BELOVED SON/BROTHER/IN-LAW/STEPSON/COUSIN is a mother fucking junkie and laugh it out loud to their faces! HAHAHA! So that is where ALL HIS SO-CALLED LOTTERY MONEY went to! Huh! ASSHOLE!

Taking crystal meths via SYRINGE! Wow! How they do it? Well, they need water to dilute the crystals and fire (hence the candles). Then they inject it into their veins.

What makes me wonder is... why isn't that bastard skinny? But drugs don't effect the same way to everyone but the most obvious is his yellow eyes and dry lips.

I hope. ONE day. His secret will be revealed. Now, I know why he dreads going to the doctor. Haha! It is all in the blood stream. And hope his kidney will be damage and unrepairable.

So, if YOU don't believe me about this, if any of your friends or family even who are junkies, look at their arms and bring them for medical checkups :) The signs are all there :)

It pays to date an ex-drug lord/addict... I learn a lot of things. But I thank God that Akim doesn't do drugs anymore FOR MY SAKE and he's proven it :D Medical reports never lie. Recently, Akim went to clean his kidney... 91% clean from drugs. His drugs days are over..

Even Bob actually... he told me he wanted to change for the sake of Hazie... Aww... so sweet. UNLIKE SOME PEOPLE. People give the best for them but they don't appreciate.

I should be done now... I don't want to talk about that bastard anymore because SOME people would think he is NOT wrong when I know he is. Considering he is the one who wreck my livelihood. The more I think of what he did to me in the past relating to his addiction for CRYSTAL METHS, the more I feel the fire of revenge within me.

So, let me rant about it all the time now only to make myself fell good after that. Afterall, it is him who will die of kidney failure in the future... not anyone else...

AKIM IS FREE FROM IT! YEY!

Fuck, I should really sleep now, I just heard something freaky from outside my window! :-s

Monday, March 30, 2009

Story Time

A Bastard Will ALWAYS Be a Bastard.

She found out something today. She found out that he was a junkie. She wasn't all that surprised. She was glad she found out the same story from another person. When she was told about it the first time, she thought it was because people didn't like him so it was natural for someone to tell her, "Matt did drugs. In front of me..."

Even when Andrew told her, she knew the story came from the same friend who told her that Matt did drugs. Matt was not liked by anyone.Until when she chatted with an old friend, Edward who told her the same thing. Knowing that Edward weren't close friends to those who told her the same story, she felt satisfied. Just before that, she had faced a difficult situation with Matt's family. They were in denial of Matt's attitude. She let go since her good friend, Bryan helped out to settle their case. She felt cheated. Matt used all her money to obtain drugs and for his sluts.

She was glad with the news she got. She was glad that she had proof that he did drugs. That bastard! When she started out her relationship with Andrew (who is an ex-drug addict), Matt called her asking her, "Why should you get yourself involved with people like Bryan and Ben? They do drugs. Your current boyfriend is also an addict!" She conveniently answered him, "At least, Andrew is trying hard to stop doing drugs for my sake. What have you done besides sucking my bank account dry?" He kept quiet.

Just be recalling that memory, she chuckled and hope the consequences of Matt taking drugs and with his family history of heart attack or bad health, it will take his life.


Ran out of ideas. Hehe!

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Today's Disappointment.

1. THE NEW YORK BLOCK AND NEW GENERATIONS OF MARIANS
-- I went to St. Mary's (for a visit and for the Food and Fun Fair) and I saw something I hated. GIRLS BEHAVING like... wh0res around boys. GOOD GOD. Are those girls or...? OH MY GOD. Unrefined! I was shocked. Even Akim was rather annoyed at them. He may had not been an EX THOMIAN but his first impression of the Marians are off. He finds them too available. Haha. Poor guy. Cultural shock. HEY! Despite me being an EX MARIAN myself, I was cultural shocked, too. There was one girl. OH MY GOD. So bloody rude. Saw two people standing in line, she cut in front of them and that two people happened to be Akim and I. About the New York Block. SHOOT! There was NO NOSTALGIC feeling to me being in St. Mary's. EVERYTHING is different. I miss stomping like a stampede of elephants on the wooden York Block. Haha! I miss everything about the OLD YORK BLOCK. They should retained. But did they? NO! >:( F**K!

2. EARTH HOUR AWARENESS
-- Our people don't seem to f**king care about GLOBAL WARMING. By switching off the damn lights, you cool the Earth down, numbnuts! I think, in my neighbourhood, my house was the only house in darkness. Why can't people be more aware of Nature? Hello? We are only BORROWING the Earth. The Earth is getting jaded.. people don't seem to understand that. It is almost sickening. Owh well. HUMANS are just too selfish~!!

Friday, March 27, 2009

(STUPID) Flash Backs II

Another one. I was having dinner at the Sarawak Club today and I noticed some WOMEN chooping with their mouth wide enough for a Mexican cockroach to crawl in! *pukes*

In the past, I was LAUGHED at for eating with my mouth closed shut!

How insane is that?

I find it RUDE to eat with your mouth opened.

Owh well. Hope they choke on a fly or something.

(STUPID) Flash Backs

I don't know why this issue have been lingering in my mind. In the past, I was surrounded by narrow-minded freaks.

Have you ever come across such a statement?

"If you call your mother, Mummy... it will be a sin for you and your mother? You will both go to Hell? Start calling your mother, MAK." (*mak is the Malay word for Mom)

So, what are you trying to imply here? All the prophets including Prophet Muhammad, himself, won't end up in Heaven for calling his mother, UMI? (*umi is the Arab word for Mom)

At least, by calling our mother, Mother (in any language, dialect or way EXCLUDING calling her by her name) is wonderful.

So, despite me being multi-cultural, I am filled with sins?

Gosh. Some people. They think they are superior not knowing of their NARROW-MINDEDNESS!

Owh well, I wish them all the best! :) See how far can they live in this world where multi-racial culturalness is concerned.

OWH, IT OCCURED TO ME, TOO. So, it is okay to do BLACK MAGIC then...? Rather than calling my mum, Mummy...?

Let's ponder.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Librarian: The Curse of the Judas Chalice

I was watching it last night. It was awesome. Noah Wyle did a good job (like he did in the first two Librarian movie)

The setting is in New Orleans and it is about vampires. Here is the synopsis.

Glenn Estate Auction in London. Flynn primps in his tux and struts with a reasonable degree of suaveness. Until he takes a sip of champagne and spits it everywhere. He checks with Charlene over the phone. He's supposed to keep someone from getting a Ming vase -- without going over budget. He gets a call from an angry and increasingly drunk girl, Katie. Mid-auction he gives her another excuse and she says he's given 100. He repeats that and has suddenly bid higher. Charlene calls on the other line, watching the numbers escalate online, asking if he's trying to bankrupt them. A series of twitches, outbursts and accidental bids later and, in an effort to get quickly to Katie waiting in the bar, Flynn jumps all the way to 1 million pounds. Charlene hyperventilates and Flynn gets the vase. The auctioneer congratulates him on appreciating fine art. Flynn picks up the vase and promptly drops it. He picks up the Philosopher's Stone from the shards. It can turn anything it touches into gold, like arm of the other bidder's henchman. Golden fist and others come after Flynn for the stone and a sword fight ensues. They stop to admire the art mid-fight and Flynn checks his watch and goes on to win.

But at the bar, he's too late. Katie has left for the airport.

Somewhere in the Carpathian mountain range some Russian goons rappel into a castle. They find the tomb they're looking for.

Flynn returns to the Library, where Charlene is on the phone, trying to explain that Flynn wasn't authorized to make that high a bid. She starts in on him, but he doesn't want to hear it. And he's ruined his tux. It's a rental.

She takes him to the large collections annex, which goes on forever. The library is as big as they need it to be. It's holding Noah's Arc and Judson is testing the Fountain of Youth. They have another job for him, translating a manuscript, and Excaliber wants to do their weekly sword training.

Flynn goes a little cuckoo, complaining that he has no life and his best friend in a sword. Since he's been working there, he hasn't been in a relationship with a woman that lasted more than six months. Judson tells him to just think of himself as a celibate monk. That doesn't help. They think maybe he should take a vacation.

University of Bucharest, a professor lectures about Vlad the Impaler. Cheery stuff. After the lecture he's approached by a man named Sergei Kubichek, who recently resigned as security minister for the Russian government. They tell the professor they found a body -- Dracula's body. Professor Lazlo says it's a hoax, he's searched for it his entire life. He looks at one of the scrolls they brought and recognizes the Judas Chalice.

Charlene shows up at Flynn's house. Her combination speed dating-wine tasting was two streets down. She seems to have enjoyed at least half of it. He's playing on-line poker in his pajamas. She tries to get him to leave town and suggests locations, like New Orleans. But he's worried New Orleans will dump him, that he'll get his hopes up and be disappointed. She tells him to follow his dream and see where it leads him. She stumbles out (she's biking).

Flynn dreams he's in a strange bed, envisioning an ethereal woman reaching for him and a man on a horse statue whinnying at him. When he wakes up, he's napping on a brochure of New Orleans. He decides to follow his dream.

He arrives there in a seersucker suit, red bow tie and straw hat, Orville Reddenbacher's long lost son. He's picked up by Andre the cab driver, who tells him he knows where to find everything. He asks to go to the museum.

(New Orleans montage of floats, crawfish, Bourbon Street, street musicians.)

Flynn leaves his hotel at night, and sees couples everywhere he goes. He follows the sound of music and a woman singing to a big castle-like building.

The professor and Sergei wait outside the old monastery, a church turned into a nightclub -- the very one where Flynn has just heard the siren sing. He walks up to the singer after and tries to talk to her. He tells her she's the woman he's been dreaming about. She agrees that it sounds like a bad pick-up line, but she wants to go somewhere more private when she sees Sergei and the goons come in. They rush into a connected church with candles lit all over the altar. He recognizes it as an echo chamber, if you stand in the right spot one voice will sound like a chorus.

She unties a key that was wrapped around her thigh and Flynn sputters. Then she tells him "it's OK, Librarian, you can drop the act" as she goes to unlock a small door on the altar. She says she called him in his dreams. The Librarian is the only one who can protect the chalice. She puts something in his hand and the goons burst in. He distracts them until she's standing in the right spot and he calls for a high C. The note shatters the glass and gives them a chance to escape.

Simone and Flynn race upstairs as the goons chase, shooting after them. They reach the top and with nowhere to go but to another rooftop, Flynn tells her not to be nervous, but they'll need to....never mind. She jump/floats safely to the other building. He does some computations and hurls himself, not quite making it all the way. She hauls him up. The goons stop short at the open window. Back downstairs they report to a disappointed boss Sergei, with Professor Lazlo supervising. He notices an impression of the marker in the altar candle wax.

Flynn and Simone stroll away safely as she tells him to embrace his destiny. She suggests they start with a drink.

They stroll, eat food from a cart and swill drinks from enormous plastic cups (passing a street trombone player, director Jonathan Frakes. What up, Riker?). Flynn stops to ask her if she's with someone. When she says no, he kisses her. Awkward silence ensues until she suggests they not say good-night and rowdy foreplay follows back up in his room. It leads where those things do.

Back in henchman HQ, they try to translate the wax. Standing guard, one goon is attacked by something growling and unseen in the night.

Flynn wakes up alone, with a red rose and the marker, which says something about a chalice. Flynn goes to a barbershop where Judson appears as a blues guitarist and customer. He wants to know about the marker. It has a riddle and a name on it which seems to indicate the Judas Chalice -- made from the 30 pieces of silver given to Judas to betray Jesus. And, also, it's said to resurrect vampires. Judas hanged himself and might be the first vampire. That explains vampire's aversion to silver and holy water.

Judson tells Flynn someone stole Dracula's coffin. The chalice also grants super powers to vampires. Romania was a French territory in the 1800s so they sent it far far away, to New Orleans, also a French territory. So the chalice might be there.

Flynn gets the cabbie to take him to a cemetery to see Marie Le Veux, mentioned on the marker. He thinks something's hidden in her tomb. It's got a huge scary carved head on it. He puts the piece of silver in its mouth, as directed in the riddle, and the face pops out. He takes what's inside, walks around the corner and is grabbed by the goons.

Back at their spooky house HQ, Flynn meets Sergei. He wants to create an army of unkillable soldiers, led by Dracula, to rebuild Russia. When Flynn says they need him to translate what he found so they can't kill him, they bring out Lazlo. Flynn, knowing and admiring Lazlo's knowledge, admits he's expendable. Sergei notices four or five of his goons have disappeared. They ply Flynn with hallucinogenic poison, but he unties his bonds and escapes. He finds Lazlo and they co-decode what looks like a coin as Flynn's trip kicks in. Flynn notices the coin is oxidizing, which means it's not silver. He rubs it, it's glass. A lens. He holds it to a candle and it casts a map, directing them to a ship in a bay. Lazlo, whose legs are in braces and who uses crutches, says he can't run to escape and tells Flynn to leave without him. He doesn't mention he's there of his own free will.

Flynn experiences what is possibly the millionth drug-induced stroll through New Orleans. The goons find him in a deserted warehouse and prepare to fire. A light appears overhead. It's Simone, then it's a puff of wispy light, then it's Simone again. She leaps across the room too fast to be seen, taking out goons and, at the last minute, jumping in front of Flynn to take a bullet meant for him. She's hit. Flynn shoots open a gas line and ignites it to escape, carrying her with him.

He sobs over her, begging her not to die because of him. She opens her eyes and sits up. Unharmed. He passes out.

He wakes up in an opulent room. She tells him he didn't see her die -- she was already dead. A vampire. He checks for holes on his neck and finds none. (She doesn't kill for food, she has a freezer full of blood.) She's 403 years old. "Well, I've dated older women before, but dead is new for me," he says. She was born in Paris. She was in love with Francois, a teacher at the university. They became engaged. She was an opera singer of the royal court by age 25. Then she died, made undead by a vampire. She never saw Francois again (in flashback we see he's Flynn with a beard). She tried to kill the vampire who made her for 200 years. She followed the trail to the monastery to protect the marker because she didn't want vampires taking over. Then she appeared in his dream, asking for help. All vampires know about the Library.

She shows him a painting of the Scholar, the greatest Librarian of all. His name translates to Judson. It's nearly daybreak. Flynn knows where the chalice is, in a bay. But she can't drive in the daylight. Flynn calls cabbie Andre to call his cousin with a boat to travel up the swamp. They'll camp in the cabin to avoid sunlight.

They arrive at nightfall, but have to paddle the rest of the way because the water's too shallow. They ignore a warning sign. They come upon a shipwrecked boat, Pirate Jean LaFitte's ship. Simone used to party on it. Flynn has a couple of vampire questions. They can die by beheading and with a stake through the heart, but only with aspen, the tree Judas hanged himself from.

They find Lafitte's skeleton, guarding his treasure. It sealed with a riddle, which they quickly figure out. They find the chalice inside. Simone starts growling, fangs out, eyes beady. It's like catnip for her. They're about to leave when Sergei and his goons arrive. Simone recognizes Lazlo, and lunges for him, and Flynn realizes his betrayal. Sergei keeps Simone at bay with a cross. Sergei tells them he plans to resurrect Vlad the next day. He locks them in the cabin, betting that she'll need to feed soon.

Flynn gets MacGyver, Librarian style. He rigs an explosion to power a canon through the door. It works, busting through and freeing them.

Back at the dock, they find Andre in pain. He's been hit from behind. As Flynn tends him Simone gets on the boat...and takes off, apologizing to him. Flynn and Andre set out on foot. They hitch a ride with another of Andre's cousins who tells them the boat is back safe on the dock.

Flynn tries to determine which plantation house the Russians are staying in, relying on clues in his photographic memory.

Flynn finds the house, about twenty feet behind Simone. He says she betrayed him, but she says she left him at the dock to protect him. They are interrupted by the goons, who tell them, "honestly, were not this good, you two kind of suck at sneaking around."

Sergei opens Vlad's coffin. Lazlo tells him next they have to poor blood into the chalice and pour it on him at the stroke of midnight. They slice Flynn's hand, and drip the blood into the chalice. It blood bubbles and a creepy wind blows. The music swells, Sergei shouts lofty things and ceremoniously pours the blood on the bones. Where it splats and nothing happens.

In the corner with the chalice, Lazlo chuckles. Then he swigs from the cup, growing tall and powerful. His leg braces spring off and Simone tells Flynn that's who she was protecting him from. He's the one who made her. Lazlo takes a bite of Sergei and feeds. He's soon joined by the missing men, turned into vampires. He tells them to call him Vlad. The body in the coffin was some peasant. He lived among humans for years until he caught cholera during the pandemic in the 1800s and was crippled. He wanted the chalice for a cure. Vlad says he'll summon his children and plunge the world into darkness. He offers it to Simone, who contemplates lustily. Then she spits her answer. The vampires attack. Flynn shoots the chandelier, blinding the vampires, and they escape. Outside, Flynn tries to intimidate Vlad, talking tough as he picks up two fence slats for protection. Inside, Simone fights vampires but, at the suggestion of a still-human goon, she goes outside to help Flynn. Just in time, because Vlad has him by the neck. Simone attacks Vlad and they are caught up in a whirl, midair. He drops the chalice. Inside, the now-redeemed goon grapples with Sergei and, near being bitten, he takes out a grenade and blows them both up, for Russia.

As Vlad gets the better of Simone, Flynn runs through the forest and into a tree. The right kind of tree. He confronts Vlad, commanding him to leave Simone alone. Flynn shows him he has the chalice, and therefore controls Vlad. Vlad, advancing, explains to the "stupid boy" that that's not how it works. Distracted, Vlad grabs for the chalice in Flynn's left hand. "Wrong hand," Flynn tells Vlad as he drives a tree branch stake through his heart. From aspen tree, the one that killed the original vampire, Judas Iscariot. Vlad bursts into flames as the faces of ghouls and spooks whoosh out. Then, poof, he's gone.

Simone comes over, smiling.

Flynn asks her to come to New York with him. He could show her the Library since she already knows about it. But she says now that he's killed the one that made her, she can be at peace. Basically, sorry, I dig you, but it's time for me to die. Flynn protests, saying there's a way they could be together. He tentatively offers up his neck. She leans in, but then only kisses him gently. She tells him he has to fulfill his destiny, as she fulfilled hers. She tells him there's one thing he could do: Watch the sunrise with her.

They sit on a bench, holding hands, as the sun rises over the water. She tells him she loved him, for a little while. They say good-bye and kiss. She slowly starts to blow away, like golden ash lifted by the wind. He's left with only her ring and the sound of her song in his head.

Back at the Library, he returns the chalice to Charlene, along with the marker. He tells her it says, "Follow your dream." His led him home.

He gives Judson the chalice. He says he'll be staying with the Library. He says he know who Judson is, that's he's over 2,000 years old. And that the Library is pitched in a larger battle between good and evil. Judson acknowledges there is a larger battle, and that Flynn and Library will play a larger role. As far as him being 2,000 years old...that's just insulting.


What I love most about this movie is... they retained the idea of vampires. How they cannot stand silver or can be killed with the aspen tree wood. UNLIKE SOMEONE'S BORING STEREOTYPE VAMPIRES! (yes, I am still sore about it)

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Thoughts

I had an interesting conversation with Akim this evening and apparently, Kuching is smaller than I expected.

At the same time, now I know that SOMEONE is actually not as tough as he claims to be. He is a bloody coward! Ah! Why should I bother? He was a liar and a coward! Poor dick. *laughs hysterically*

Anyway. Let me sail on without thinking about that bum!

I think. I have nothing much to say but then, there is something I want to add in here. I didn't know Freddie Mercury was ASIAN and I thought he was homosexual but he was actually bisexual.

But, no matter what, he was a brilliant artist! :D

QUEEN ROCKS!

Anyone who thinks Queen sucks, need a life! Anyone who claim so better not like We Will Rock You or We Are The Champion... I will make sure they will regret telling me they hate Queen. SERIOUSLY!

I wish I was in K.L - staying in the Concorde or Istana Hotel... EXTREMELY FAST INTERNET CONNECTION. Considering they are using T1.

Owh well. Stop here now.

Something I Learnt Today

Farrokh Bulsara
As Freddie Mercury, he showed the world just how hard a Parsi boy could rock

Hardly anyone thinks of Farrokh Bulsara as an Asian. To the world he was the rock star Freddie Mercury, lead singer of Queen, with features and an accent that were ethnically vague but probably British, if one had to guess. (Indeed, he was listed as one of the 100 Greatest Britons in a 2002 BBC poll.) There is a statue of him in Montreux, Switzerland, but none in the Eastern hemisphere. The truth, however, is that Bulsara was the son of two Indians from Gujarat and was a member of the small religious community of Parsis, or Zoroastrians. Though born on the Indian Ocean island of Zanzibar, where his father Bomi worked as a High Court cashier, Bulsara was educated at boarding schools in Bombay. He learned piano at St. Peter's School in Panchgani, a short distance from the city, and among his formative musical influences was the great Bollywood singer Lata Mangeshkar.

When you know this about Bulsara, the characteristics of his music make sense. The baroque flourishes of a song like Bohemian Rhapsody, the complex time signatures, the flamboyant stage costumes, the high camp and effortless incorporation of musical styles from jazz to gospel to 1950s rock 'n' roll: if the best Bollywood directors and screenwriters could conceive of a rock band it would be something like Queen, and its frontman would be a mustachioed, spandex-clad peacock like Bulsara. His worldwide commercial success, however, exceeded anything to come out of a Bombay studio lot. Queen have sold over 150 million albums, and according to the Guinness Book of Records are the most successful album act in U.K. history, their recordings spending a cumulatively longer time in the album charts than the Beatles'. In a 2002 Guinness poll, Bohemian Rhapsody—which topped the U.K. singles charts in both 1975 and 1991—was voted Britain's favorite single of all time. In 2003, Bulsara—who died in 1991 at age 45—was rated second only to Mariah Carey in MTV's 22 Greatest Voices in Music.

Bulsara duplicated in popular music what other Indians—such as Salman Rushdie and Vikram Seth—have done in literature: taking the colonizer's art form and representing it in a manner richer and more dazzling than many Anglophones thought possible. But in his case, the empire wasn't merely writing back—it was singing its heart out in arenas all over the world in a voice that spanned nearly four octaves. Put on Queen's Greatest Hits at any party, anywhere, and there will be a song to bring a smile to the face of almost anyone, of any age. No other Asian musician or pop-cultural figure has enjoyed the same universal appeal: that Bulsara was able to achieve this as an openly gay man from India is further testament to his gift. It's time to recognize him as the great Asian artist that he was, and to bring his memory home.

I Saw Something I Don't Like: A GOD DISRESPECTING SOUL

Tatz Gurlz Iz Keymak?! Gedik?! Kenja?! Rampaz Ex Owg Jak2?! WTF! Coba Tekak Capa Nya Ya?! Nya Slalu Padah Gerex Nya "HOT"! WTF! Wow! Berik Malu Aku Jak Ko Ya! Ko "Hot" Kah?! Ya Allah! Kacak Gk Tuhan Daripada Kau!

(TRANSLATION: That girl is a pussy?! Slutty?! Itchy?! Snatching people's ex?! What the fuck! Try and guess who?! She always claim that her ex is "HOT"! What the fuck! Wow! You're only giving me shame! You "HOT"? Ya Allah! Even God is prettier than you!)
So... Do you see the reason why I posted that here? I coloured the font. Why did the person compare a girl whom she doesn't like to God, who is by the way, PERFECT in all ways?

If only I know that girl personally. I would have given her a piece of my mind. Ya Allah.......

Scars

Never did it occur to me that it would be you,
Who took back me by the hand out from the cold stinging rain,
The smile on your face so weak,
Made me hated you and loved you at the same time;
Yet I remained in the pool of red you left me in once before,
The sharp edge device pierced through my soul,
Which made me bleed and left a scar so deep,
Though it will heal but it is still a reminder of the past…

You cannot see my falling tear drops,
For its been concealed by the pouring rain,
You can’t hear my mournful serenade,
Which is masked by the raging thunder;
You cannot feel the pain within my heart,
Because yours is filled with emptiness,
You can’t see the emptiness within my eyes,
Because it is covered by fake happiness…

Deep within my soul,
I am haunted by the loneliness which lives within me,
My heart is full of hatred;
From the darkness that dwells deep inside of me;
The scars you left me with,
The puddle of bloody red that flow down from me,
Reminds me of the pain I felt without you,
All I needed in this miserable life of mine is you…

Something To Laugh At

I did a personality test on my Facebook and my actual age is 31!

I am doing "Who Were You In A Past Life"... getting the result now... And it is...

*rolls on the floor laughing her ass off*

In your past life you were Marylin Monroe. In this life you continue to be radiant, happy, whimsical, and daring.

I wish I was as gorgeous as her. Haha!

Owh well. I was being random. So mind me.

Friday, March 20, 2009

Food For Thought

Don't bring the past into the present because that will only destroy your future.

I learnt that lesson during that black weekend...

Bringing the past into the present is a fatal mistake in many things. It could destroy your future happiness.

Owh well. Just a food for thought.

Give It Up Already

HELL-LO!

When I show NO INTEREST in you or ANYONE to do with you. I expect YOU to respect my privacy!

Why can't you understand that though you think you gesture is kind and being nice it could also be ANNOYING?!?

I cannot stand it when people don't respect my privacy. If I am not interested in knowing what is going on with you or anyone to do with you. It bugs me. It means stepping into my border.

Why did God give you a brain when you don't use it. There is a reason why I don't want to do anything with you or anyone to do with you anymore. Why? Answer is simple, you've got a brain, you think about it!

Gosh. I wish I could hate you but I can't hate you without trying to stand up for what is right for me because the people on your side has so much points against me and I can easily use the law against that person! Fraud. Harassment. Blackmail.

THINK ABOUT IT.

Yours Sincerely, Jaja.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Privacy and Such

I don't know what made me think about blogging this issue but I don't really understand some people... people who doesn't understand the meaning of respecting other people's privacy. It makes me wonder why they behave the way they behave.

Don't they ever stop and think, "What if someone were to do the same thing I am doing to so and so?"

Sometimes, I think people like those who don't respect other people's privacy don't have a brain. They have brains but they lack the ability to use it. They are not considerate...

Some bugger's approach is pretty undeniably LAME... when they want to know about someone's life, they pretend to be the THIRD PARTY.

Gosh. Don't they have a life...? It makes me wonder. Owh well. Let them be. Hope one day people would mind their privacy.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Another Entry About People

I cannot stand it when people look at you funny as if you stole something from them when you didn't.

And it also irks me when parents can't seem to control their kids. It really makes me angry when I see kids running around like chicken with the head cut off. Or those screaming and yelling like their bloody lives depended on it.

Sometimes, I wish I could scream them for doing what they do because it ANNOYS me.

Argh. Really feel like killing such people. Or just poke their bloody eyeballs out :P

Gotta go now :(

LATER!

About People

I am glad that I have come across many types of human beings. They are pretty interesting actually.

In the past, I was being lied to, cheated on and back stabbed. By an ex and his useless friends.

Now, I know what being in a family means... a family of friends... I know how it feels like to be accepted.

People. We're not perfect but then. There are better people than others who think that they are good out there.

Life. Wonderfully screwed. Haha!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

RANTS

Sometimes, borders are drawn for a reason. You need a life to know what it is living in the world outside. When there are borders, don't overstep them. You might make a huge mistake.

Though we are not getting any younger, it is never wrong to have some fun sometimes. It is annoying that people tend to preach something that they don't practice.

Owh well. Being mature is being able to know what is coming towards you and facing it by reaping what you sow or without thinking of having some fun.

Better than living life as lonely as it can be, have a few good friends to support you from behind and at least have some fun while you are at it :D

I can't stand it when some people who doesn't know how the outside world look like starts preaching like a preacher but does not know what they are talking about. That is being immature and these are the people who turn around talking about being mature. Owh well. Spoken like a true hypocrite, LIKE SOME OTHER NARROW-MINDED people I know.

They think they are perfect, yeah yeah, go ahead, slander about other people but they don't know what is in store for them. They are being rather ungrateful. They are the ones behaving as if the world revolves around them.

Owh well, people like that will never go far in life. Seriously, they won't. They will forever be narrow as they can possibly get.

EVERYTHING THEY ONCE TOLD ME, AS LIES AS THEY WERE, THEY WERE SPOKEN LIKE A TRUE HYPOCRITE. THEY WERE ALL WISHFUL THINKINGS.

Owh well. THAT made me stronger than I am now. THAT made me think more wisely. With REAL friends behind you backing you up. Understanding the true meaning to togetherness. That makes life AWESOME.

Annoyed

I realised, nowadays, things some people do annoys the living daylights out of my life. Like how everyone is in a hurry to get married. How people are desperate for a boyfriend/girlfriend. It is annoying.

What makes me annoyed more is when someone (a friend) comes up to me bitching and whining on how they don't have a boyfriend or a girlfriend... WHY SO DESPERATE? Some are willing to go to the extend on dating a ... oh my. God.. JUNKIE!

I've got a friend, oh. My. God. Just because of his inability to be girlfriendless, he is willing to date a junkie. Not just a junkie but a TOMBOY who smokes like a chimney! Oh. My. God! I was a tomboy but I was never like that girl... she is a drug addict. She smokes like a boy. She behaves like a boy. Oh. My. God. I feel sorry for my friend.

The other kind of person I cannot stand is a guy who can't seem to make decisions. I don't trust guys like that. I wonder, how does a girl expect to rely on him if she ends up becoming his wife but at the same time, when dating with one girl, he has more than two girls behind her back. THAT I CANNOT STAND.

Gosh. I am so annoyed with a lot of people nowadays. They make themselves look so desperate it is not funny.

But what I cannot stand is how people tend to make a big hu ha about being single that they are willing to look so available. It is worse if it was a girl who behaves like that... damn.

Oh well.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Oh. My. God.

I had never in my life met a girl who smokes like a chimney and who is addicted to drugs. And... OH MY GOD... NO SELF-RESPECT!

She may be a tomboy but doesn't mean she behaves the way she does. Oh my God... I've known so many other tomboys, but they don't behave the way she does.

I don't want to think about it anymore... the thought of it sends shiver through my spine. Oh. My. God.................

Monday, March 9, 2009

No Use For A Title

Lately I have been ranting alot about mindless people. People who doesn't seem to know where to stick their nose into. Anyway, on the happier side, I have something to share. I think I have something to share.

I have been taking the chance to be Athena's biscuit napper. I really love Farley's Rusk (ORIGINAL). It sounds weird but it is pretty addictive when you start munching on it. It is so milky. The thought of it makes me drool. Haha! Damn.

Also, I have been hooked onto The Sims Pet Stories. I hadn't stop playing it since I got it installed into my laptop. My latest house is like below:-

My Sims House

It all started out with boredom. EXTREME boredom. So, after finishing the preset game called Midnight Masquerade... I got a new neighbourhood, Mesa Flats. So, since it was a desert suburb, I decided to build a flat roof house. Although, personally, I think this house would look better in white. Haha!

Also, I have been crazy writing notes on Facebook. One of it is:-

band.jpg

Name of my band : Shahid
Album : Life and I Love It

TRACKS:-

1) Person I Know Best
2) More Friends Than Boring
3) Nothing Ever Goes Away
4) One's Own
5) Too Young, Too Old
6) An Evangelist For Your Work
7) Messenger Boys
8) Something Else
9) The Kind of Love We Really Want
10) Bourgeois
11) Long Postponed
12) Merely for Themselves
13) Life and I Love It
14) Lie Down And Rest
15) Beyond All Boundaries
16) In This Together
17) Better Tomorrow

HOW TO GET YOUR OWN ALBUM?

My debut album!

Things you do when you've nothing to do. Now you've been tagged, read the instructions below ;)

1 - Open http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.
(alternatively, if the first article you hit is short, hit Random Article two more times.)

2 - Open http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album. For track list, refresh page and repeat first step when looking for first album title except your track title can be only one word or more. Be sure that one track must be the same title as the album.

3 - Open http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 - Use Photoshop/paint or similar to put it all together.

It is fun. AND. The next thing is for those who enjoy sticking their bloody noses into my private life... READ ON, ASSWIPES...

PLEASE [pleez]
(used as a polite addition to requests, commands, etc.) if you would be so obliging; kindly: Please come here. Will you please turn the radio off?

RESPECT [ri-spekt]
- to refrain from intruding upon or interfering with: to respect a person's privacy.

MY [mai]
- (a form of the possessive case of I used as an attributive adjective): My soup is cold.

PRIVACY [priv-uh-see]
- the state of being free from intrusion or disturbance in one's private life or affairs: the right to privacy.

SPELLS OUT
: PLEASE RESPECT MY PRIVACY!

I think, that will be it from me today. I will blog more once I get my mind straigth straight! That shows how delirious I am tonight. Haha! Damn!

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Personality Test

This is pretty accurate.

Click here...

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

I Hate It

I really hate people like them. Seriously. They can't seem to mind their own business. Makes me wonder what is so interesting about my life that they enjoy minding my business. Jeez. What I hate most are people like this:-

1) They add your friends to their Friendster or Facebook just to dig out secrets about you.

2) They find out stories about you only to make up more stories about you.

3) People who can't seem to stop bugging other people's lives...

I hate people like those above. They don't deserve to live. I wish they would just disappear!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Pissed

I hate it when people can't seem to mind their own business.

Enough said.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

My Birthday :)

Sorry for disappearing for so long. Hadn't had the groove to blog lately. Here goes.

My thanks to all who've been wishing me since the starting of March. You guys rock and may you have an awesome day ahead of you :D

Every year, since I turned 16 (2000), I never looked forward for my birthday. I thought, it wasn't a good thing that I came into the world. I shouldn't exist. I shouldn't be around.

Yet, along came some friends I never knew I would meet. They were people people somehow feared... but they made my day feel worth living for. (I may have some friends who wish me and I love them for that..)

No doubt, I make big deals out of birthdays because I know it is a day you were brought into the world. It is a special day. It is a day of birth. But no one made a big deal out of mine (don't count family - family always make birthday special and I love them for that.. family NEVER forgets..).

In 2005, I thought, I have someone to share my day with. But I was wrong. From the looks of it, that person didn't bother of my day of existence when I made a big deal out of his. In 2006, I was ditched for a stupid mindless useless event. That hurt me.

Since that year, I realised that that person didn't think birthdays were important. So, I didn't expect anyone to make a fuss over it. Or make me appreciate it.

Then came along 2009. The year I turned 25 years old. I was promised by two awesome dudes. One I love like I love a brother. The other whom I see as my potential husband. Akim and Bob both told me the same thing when I said, "I never look forward to my birthday..."

"This year, I promise, will be different because you have Akim and the Clan..." Bob said.

"I promise, you will not feel the same about your birthday like usual. You will feel special. Because you already have me." Akim told me.

I took their words and they proved it to me. YESTERDAY they proved it to me. I was feeling happy all day yesterday. I was laughing my arse off since morning till around 2 am this morning.

It felt nice when TWO (not one) persons assure that your birthday will be different than any other year and kept their promises. I don't expect gifts from them, just their promises to assure me that my day will be perfect.

Hey, if the pre-birthday was awesome... what more of the actual day and the post-birthday itself? :D

AND I SWEAR MY SISTERS ARE PSYCHIC! THEY GOT ME THE BOOK I WAS TELLING AKIM ABOUT LAST NIGHT! Thank you! :D

TODAY WAS THE BOMB!

Friday, February 13, 2009

My Thoughts About Valentine's Day

A short one. I promise. Haha.

Everything become expensive. ONE flower which originally cost RM2.50 at most will cost RM15 OR MORE.

So? Why must people think that a special day for romance should be on ONE particular day - the execution day of a Roman saint, too? Pretty depressing, if you ask me. If people want to think that getting executed after sending a love note is romantic. Let's all get executed, too after sending a love note to our loved one. :D

Some people may think I'm being cynical. I'm not. I'm just being straight with what I think. And logical.

Lalala...

Go figure.